IPL - A solution to Global Economic Recession

If you think, due to recession and Barrack Obamas' policies "Outsourcing" will/has taken a beating, no one else on planet earth can be more wrong, idiotic, stupid and all its synonyms than you. However, let me make it clear that the trend has just begun. All attributed to one great man -perhaps a Nobel Peace Prize nominee- called Lalit Modi. But, we ought to take other factors also in to account as without them it would not have been possible. The obvious list has hi-fi names like Boria Majumdar, P.Chitambaram, N.Gopalaswami, State govt. and couple of police commissioners. The lateral entrants were Narendra Modi and Arun Jaitely.

Okay.. so Lalit Modi is on the verge of fixing global economic downturn beating the hell outta economists and policy makers. Indian Premier League (IPL) has been shifted to South Africa. This will help SA to overcome economic losses. "Lots of moolah commin in. N m lovin it" said a rather sluggish looking investment banker who was laid off last year.

So atlast its Indians who are helping world recover historic losses. How?? Outsourcing. Taking an inspiration form IPL and Lalit Modi many firms/organizations/NGO's/PSU's/edu. instis have shifted their meets/conferences venues around the globe. This has -obviously- given a new lease of life to sick and pessimistic economic condition of most countries.

A National Thermal Power Corporation (NTPC) press release said they have shifted their annual general meeting's venue from New Delhi, India to Mongolia. This was later confirmed by NTPC chairman, Mr. Venkatachary. The excuse he gave was "State government is not willing to provide us security, we had talks with Home Ministry as well. But, they too were helpless due to upcoming elections." He ended the press meet with a sarcastic smirk.

Commonwealth Games scheduled to take place next year too have been outsourced to nearby Myanmar (erstwhile Burma).

A Indian Institute of Management (IIM's) representative told us that IIM's will have their "Convocation ceremony" held at Thailand. "Our students will have chance to see white elephants too. He he he..." said someone. Security was the excuse again.

In a unrelated incident, a Public Interest Litigation (PIL) was filed in supreme court by a well known social group that offers help to the abandoned, pleading the court to shift "Kasav/Kasab's" (lone survivor of 26/11) trail to any more safe place and had listed few like... Uganda, Kenya, Czech Republic, Palestine, Pakistan or Iraq as these countries are willing to provide decent level of security.

Events gone out of India

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Now local journalists have bad time redoing their itinerary. But they are happy as many of them stand a chance to get an all expense paid trip to foreign lands. On behalf of Journalist Union (JU) Boria Mazumdar said "The government could have provided security. But BCCI has no what-so-ever business in criticizing govt." on Times Now. He was furious and warned Chitambaram that he will face his wrath in future.

Whose POV really matters

Meanwhile, Alan Greenspan -a popular economist- is happy that whole world is reciprocating what India has done. Most firms/govt. dept.s are randomly changing their meeting venues. A company from the Gulf all of sudden had its Quarterly performance press conference at Varanasi. In a other unrelated incident Mexican telecoms minister arrived at Hubli in Karnataka, where he supposedly had a "cutting chai" and biscuits before meet with Mexican planning commission members. And not-so strangely Satyam's Ramalinga Raju made a public appearance at 10 Downing Street - official residence of PM of England- and sent his resignation through media.

Things coming to India

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"What the hell.. I'm going nuts.. I'm going crazy.. how the hell can Lalit Modi find solution to economic meltdown" yelled a ecstatic Alan Greenspan, who devoted his whole life towards economics. "Now everyone is going everywhere. Carrying liquidity with them. Haven't seen such a helm.. Yaay its over.. its over" continued Greenspan before anyone could console him. These happenings have -obviously- left RBI and FED reserves people stunned and speechless.

Greenspan before IPL moved to SA